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14 May 2008 @ 06:30 am
rinstall 2008 ~ progress report  
well the reverting to the factory settings has done the trick. The computer is working. The hotspot isn't so I am tethered again. I am reinstalling everything now, I can't seem to find open office though which has me scratching my head. I just put it on the new pc, so where the hell did I put the install cds?

hmm


anyways, hope all of you have a good day.
Not sure what it will be for me today.
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Current Mood: busy
 
 
13 May 2008 @ 10:48 pm
Amateur cooking, the LSAT, men who explain things, and Twilight  
I'm a cooking amateur: anyone can attest to that. I haven't really taken a serious stab at real cooking until now: had a passing interest, sure, knew how to make a handful of American and Korean and god-knows-what comfort foods, definitely, actually made a serious effort, not so much. A lot of factors are impacting this, naturally: money concerns, kitchen cleanliness, my growing impulse to go vegetarian, etc., etc. It's been fun. I've made a few things with quinoa in the past, but I just tried it with pesto, which worked surprisingly well (or [info]faded_enmity seemed to think so, at least). Maybe I'll try my hand at some of the more involved quinoa recipes out there and see what I can do. Or just work on getting basics down for more complicated pastas. We'll see. So much to learn.

I'm taking the LSAT this October, as I'm idly tossing around the idea of getting my J.D. It's an intimidating exam, to say the least. Probably the only truly intimidating standardized test I can say I've run into: the GRE was kind of like an SAT part II. Maybe I'm overrating its difficulty, I couldn't say.

In a more topical vein, an excellent L.A. Times article: Men who explain things, on conversation and prejudices and things you might not think about when you're talking to someone about a subject you think you understand. Pretty fucking spot-on.


Yes, it's true that guys like this pick on other men's books, and people of both genders pop up at events to hold forth on irrelevant things and conspiracy theories, but the out-and-out confrontational confidence of the totally ignorant is, in my experience, gendered.

Men explain things to me, and to other women, whether or not they know what they're talking about. Some men. Every woman knows what I mean. It's the presumption that makes it hard, at times, for any woman in any field; that keeps women from speaking up and from being heard when they dare; that crushes young women into silence by indicating, the way harassment on the street does, that this is not their world. It trains us in self-doubt and self-limitation just as it exercises men's unsupported overconfidence.

This syndrome is something nearly every woman faces every day, within herself too, a belief in her superfluity, an invitation to silence, one from which a fairly nice career as a writer (with a lot of research and facts correctly deployed) has not entirely freed me. After all, there was a moment there when I was willing to believe Mr. Very Important and his overweening confidence over my more shaky certainty.


Enough of the srs bzns, though -- I have to give in. I thought I wouldn't, I swore I wouldn't, but I have to give my thoughts on yaoi Twilight. Why on earth is this book popular? Why the hell is derivative, second-rate romance novel, sexed-up-to-an-uncontroversial-point badboy vampire YA still marketable and a staggering success? Aren't we 20 years past that? YA as a genre has produced some pretty stunning stuff: M.T. Anderson's The Astonishing Life of Octavian Nothing, Traitor to the Nation, for one, stuff that's amazingly written and human and dark and gritty in a way that doesn't have a thing to do with Frank Miller.

I guess I'm expecting too much, though, as this is a YA industry that on its non-fantasy/sci-fi flipside still has Gossip Girl and the A-list novels bestselling. So much great stuff out there, though -- and yet, Twilight. Sometimes I hate my favorite genres. It's an abusive relationship.
 
 
Current Music: The Magnetic Fields
 
 
13 May 2008 @ 07:13 pm
IMG00411.jpg  

IMG00411.jpg
Originally uploaded by emmigeek

**weeps**

At least important stuff has been moved off the computer
Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

 
 
13 May 2008 @ 09:25 pm
Wiscon Schedule is Up!  
Take a look at the Wiscon schedule and see my name in lights!

Hey, your computer screen is lit, isn't it? Hence, lights.
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Current Mood: bouncy
 
 
13 May 2008 @ 07:52 pm
computer go boom  
I have done scans, and whatnot and have come to the conclusion that the laptop is going to get a program reinstall. **sigh**

I may be offline for a bit.
 
 
Current Mood: annoyed
 
 
14 May 2008 @ 09:12 am
Happiness  
In the past few weeks, I've encountered three entirely different streams of thought about happiness.

1. The Active: "What is the way to happiness? There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way." - Buddha
2. The Passive: Happiness is like the sun: it should be enjoyed when it comes and while it shines." - Isobelle Carmody
3. The Irrelevant: "I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves." - Ludwig Wittgenstein

The conflict between them is throwing me for a loop. In general, happiness means a lot to me. I feel like I'm a better person when I'm happy: more generous, more open-minded, more sympathetic, more likely to engage the world in positive ways. So for me, happiness is something I want in my life.

1. I like this concept. It was a minor revelation the first time I saw it written out on a poster. No matter what shit hitteth the fan, it is possible and indeed desirable to seek personal harmony through happiness in spite of the resultant shower. It is by no means an easy philosophy to enact, especially when one is feeling angry, bloated and wallowish, but I do see how it makes things better in the end. The best way to enter to Horse and Buggy O' Happiness is to step up and pick up the reins.

2. This concept also makes sense. Sometimes you can't force-feed yourself happiness (not even in the form of chocolate) and there's nothing you can do to make yourself feel better that you haven't already tried. So when bright moments occur, bask while they last. It's not the ideal philosophy to live by 24/7, because you'll just find yourself resenting cloudy weather, but it does have its motivational push as well: don't take current happiness for granted, because presently it could be gone. So #2 can easily work in partnership with #1. Especially considering I now live in the sunshine capital of New Zealand. Lots of opportunity to bask.

---reconciled up to this point---

3. This is the concept that threw me for a loop. What if happiness is completely irrelevant?

Of course, that's not exactly what Herr Wittgenstein is saying: he's talking about the pleasure principle, which is different. But it's possible I'm confusing the two, which is the root of my dilemma. My life lately has been based around the fulfillment of desires. Travel. Publication. Warmer climate. Visiting Friends. Idle Enjoyment. I've spent a number of years pursuing happiness with purpose. But what if I got it backwards? What if I should be pursuing purpose with happiness?

Maybe that's why I have this recurring problem of never being bloody well satisfied the instant I've achieved what I want.

[Giles voice] Oh, I get it. It's all about the journey, isn't it? [/Giles voice]

Ben is Glory... and Glory is Ben!

So yeah. I'm going to try to manage 1 + 2 + 3 = Happy Purposefulness and see where it gets me.

I'll keep you posted ;)
 
 
Current Mood: contemplative
 
 
13 May 2008 @ 02:22 pm
Thanks Mom Bone Marrow Donor Drive  
Consider going to the National marrow donor program to join the Mother's day bone marrow donor drive going on through May 19th.

Generally to become a bone marrow donor it costs a fee that covers the cost of the test kit used to type you for donation. During this drive registration is free for the first 10,000 people to register online and the first 36,000 people who register in person.

They have an especially dramatic shortage of minority bone marrow donors. Please spread the word.

Turns out I don't qualify to donate - deferred due to chronic back and neck problems. But you may be able to.
 
 
13 May 2008 @ 10:21 am
 
My printer asks silly things of me. Like just now, it wanted more paper.

Fickle machine.
 
 
12 May 2008 @ 06:01 pm
Salon, Salon . . . Jewelry!  
Despite kind encouragement from the world's greatest auctioneer, I really can't say it any better than our esteemed colleague the multitalented Ms. Bradford. And now my jaw is a-drop at the amazing conversation about Beading as Interstitial Art that is happening amongst crafties and IAF Auction contributors [info]elisem, [info]ktempest, [info]copperwise, (moderator) [info]krismcd59 and others on our third IAF Online Salon. You should go join them.

I'm just going to go take a hot bath and let everyone else be articulate and talented for awhile.
 
 
13 May 2008 @ 09:33 am
Thoughts  
My St John induction course is still a month away. I'm starting to feel restless again without shifts to look forward to, especially with work being relatively slow as well.

On the bright side, I've written 1000 words over the last few days, entered a contest to win an electric scooter, and discovered that Mike Carey's Lucifer keeps getting better with each successive volume. And that's saying a lot considering Vol. 1 blew me away! Heaven vs. Hell; duels; cosmic rebellions; political intrigue in the divine and demonic realms; snarky ex-cherubs. How much better can it get?
 
 
Current Mood: restless
 
 
12 May 2008 @ 01:16 pm
 
Took mom out for a lobster lunch for mothers day. YUM.

After doing running around and being a mom.
And carrying a moose of a baby because he refused to wear his new sandals. Oiy, anyways, I am home, tired and ready for a nap but I have too much to do around the house. All righty, back to the laundry
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Current Mood: content
 
 
12 May 2008 @ 09:52 am
Lunch of th now  

Lunch of th now
Originally uploaded by emmigeek

Yum.
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12 May 2008 @ 10:34 am
Mint hot chocolate is yummy.  
Wow, it's been a month since my last post, since the Great Purse Snatching of 2008 at Philly Flavors. Yes, I can laugh about it now. :) It cost a lot of money and time, but things are mostly straightened out, and there are certainly many worse things in the world, like the situation in Myanmar or the horrible story in Austria which I can't go into detail about here, or I'll end up throwing up. So thank you all for your support.

I haven't posted because there isn't really anything new to report. I still don't have a job (although I've been lucky enough to find some contract work to tide me over for the moment), bills keep coming, I haven't finished my latest writing projects, ad nauseum.

But you know what? I'm happy. I loathe this cold weather that forced me to wear a sweater in the middle of May, but I'm happy! My allergies are wreaking havoc on my system, but I'm happy. Go figure. Friends are reaching out in different ways, I'm remembering more to appreciate the little things, and just relax and enjoy.

I'm still having trouble sleeping properly, but I think a large part of that is due to my allergies. When you can't really breathe due to clogged nasal passages, it's hard to rest, but at least that will pass.

I do plan on writing an entry about belonging soon, though. I just have to finish getting my thoughts together.

And I am writing. That makes me incredibly happy. It's been a struggle. I suffer with the typical writer's insecurity, with the thought that I'm not writing quickly enough, with the notion that whatever I write sucks, and that no one cares whether I write or not, so why bother? But I'm still bothering, and that's huge. All my online people (including [info]grayrose76, [info]m_stiefvater, [info]brennayovanoff, and [info]everflame) as well as my real-time people, like [info]vash137 and lots of others who aren't on LiveJournal have been wonderful about keeping me going and offering love and support.

So I'm finishing up the first draft of the story previously known as "Chromovore" and will then get back to my novel. I've been told if I don't finish, I will be sorry. So I guess I'd better finish, eh?

I've been reading a lot of manuscripts, too, and I love, love, love that people both allow me this secret sneak peek of works in progress and that they trust my judgment as a critiquer. I'm very honored. And I can say that I will so happy to have my own copy of [info]m_stiefvater's Lament and Ballad and [info]squirrel_monkey's latest, once they come out. (And [info]squirrel_monkey will be coming to speak to my writers' group in June! I'm so excited. :) )

Oh, and my order of Tiffany Trent's books is finally on its way from Amazon! Took long enough. I can't wait to sink my teeth into the next three Hallowmere volumes. . .

And this past weekend was great. I scratched my eye on Friday, which was scary, so [info]aryasura and I went to the optometrist, but she said the eye had healed overnight. She did tell me, though, that the oil glands around my eyes are clogged, so my eyes dry out too quickly. To counter that, I need to wash the rims of my eyelids and my eyelashes twice daily with a solution of diluted baby shampoo and eat lots of walnuts (for their Omega-3s). (Just in case this happens to any of you.)

Then Ed and I had a yummy lunch in which I ate too much--oof!--and wandered over to Tbar, this tea place I like a lot and had been meaning to show him for months. Who was there but [info]vash137? So we sat with her, drank super yummy white tea, and chatted about lots of things.

Ed and I went home, where he napped, and I read. Then our friend Mark came over, and we had dinner, and I got tipsy. They thought it was funny, silly boys. :)

And yesterday, I wrote and read. It was cold and grey outside, so that was the best way to spend the day. Once Ed got home from working on his car, we went grocery shopping, and he made me spaghetti for dinner while I watched Animation Domination. Happy days!

In case I don't feel the urge to post again for awhile, happy early birthday to [info]rumdiculous! Your package will be on its way come Tuesday.

Love to everyone!
 
 
Current Location: work
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: People chatting.
 
 
12 May 2008 @ 08:25 am
Jason Van Hollander dips into Classic Imagery to Illustrate Attack of the Jazz Giants  
Jason Van Hollander dips into Classic Imagery to Illustrate Attack of the Jazz Giants

Attack of the Jazz Giants

Golden Gryphon Press chose the cover artist for Attack of the Jazz Giants, and in "Six-Degrees of Separation" event, they selected Jason Van Hollander, a multiple World Fantasy Award winning artist who also happens to live a block from me.


I live in an artistic community, though you wouldn't know it if you came to visit. On the surface, everything appears to be normal here, the way it would be if we'd all been taken over by pods from outer space. My next door neighbor, Bryan Willette, is a stained glass artist. Up the street is carpenter, and next to him a guy who builds movie sets. Across the street from Jason, a photographer. Behind us, a guitar virtuoso. A few blocks away, a children's book illustrator/writer.


This communal spirit created a rare collaborative bond between us. Not only was Jason showing me sketches for the cover, he was also proposing to include interior illustrations for the stories.



I printed out the stories that we'd selected for the collection and he read them. He asked questions about them. He followed me home in the dark. (You, you foolish people, you think I'm kidding.)We spent time in a few libraries, researching source material. I hunted up images of Bing Crosby and Bob Hope for him, while he invaded the stacks on a quest for odd Russian iconography for another set of drawings. He threw himself into the creation of the book, vanishing for days, weeks, at a time, only to turn up with another weird piece of carefully stippled illustration--of Elvis nailed up as Jesus, of a drug-warped head of Edgar Allan Poe topping the body of the Conqueror Worm, of the Virgin Mary reflected in the protective goggles of a face that looks remarkably like his own.



All of this time and effort he put into the project was out of pure love for it, because the publisher couldn't pay for interiors. They were getting them because he was compelled to create them.



Only two artists I've ever worked with have solicited opinions from me about the artwork they proposed to put on my books: Thomas Thiemeyer, who painted the magnificent covers for the Shadowbridge books; and Jason Van Hollander, whose strange and grotesque artwork is the personification of Arkham House the way it used to be--the distorted, twisted architecture of Innsmouth and a dozen other Lovecraftian landscapes.



Derangement turned inside out. And yet, like a diseased mirror, his work reflects the range of dark fantasy and horror and, yes, humor that lies between the covers of Attack of the Jazz Giants & Other Stories. I can't imagine these stories of mine now without the accompanying illustrations. And in the process I gained a mordant, talented, remarkable friend.



So long as his sly wit graces the neighborhood, I'll know that we've not yet been taken over completely by the pod people.











gf (with assistance from Don Lafferty)
 
 
Current Mood: warm & fuzzy
Current Music: "On the Road to Recovery"
 
 
11 May 2008 @ 10:14 pm
Emerald City Comic Con 08: Five Seven Five  

I was burned out on the notion of writing a con report until I thought of doing haikus.

Then the whole gang got into it. Here are some of mine:

Loud fight with girlfriend
turns into performance art
when you’re cosplaying.

Warren Ellis said
He wanted to have me killed
Most effective blurb.

We’re webcomics fans
We’re not used to paying for
Anything we read.

He buys five minis
“You’ve been very well reviewed”
Thank you, nice bloggers.

These and a whole bunch more over at Periscope.

Originally published at sararyan.com. You can comment here or there.

 
 
11 May 2008 @ 07:53 pm
we love Holly Black, but . . . .  
. . . that doesn't mean we're going to let [info]blackholly just walk away with [info]krismcd59's fabulous "Rainbird" earrings (inspired by Holly Phillips' "Queen of the Butterfly Kingdom") for a mere lowball offer of $20.50 over at the Interfictions Auction in the next 12 hours, now does it?

(Hey, [info]klages, how'm I doing?)
 
 
11 May 2008 @ 02:59 pm
KRIJTJES  
I bet you didn't know that there were this many varieties of licorice in Holland alone . . . .! -- found while looking for a source for my favorites - I'm down to the last few in my little bag of "Oudhollands" brand from De Tuinen (hoarder? me? just because these are from, um, the same bag that got me through our move, which I am carefully eking out until...); I feel that they are inadequately described on the site as "Krijtjes drop white licorice pastilles" and "Krijtjesdrop (licorice crayons): peppermint shell with a licorice paste inside. Taste: sweet, peppermint." - to me, they're more like a salty licorice with a streak of menthol. ?? I'll give you the powdered white outsides, though - they look a bit like giant white pencil erasers. I guess.
 
 
11 May 2008 @ 11:28 am
Play in a Day Part 2  
Our plays were shown last night, and between staying up all night Friday to write it, and staying up all night Saturday to drive back to Tempe, I'm a tired little writer. 

We were partnered up randomly, and given three props (a green koosh ball, a pair of leather saddlebags, and a child's baton) to use, along with the line of dialogue: "People like you are the reason people like me take medication."  My partner was Je Moore, who was a good fit for me because our play was about young people, and he has a good grasp on their vocabulary since he's a teacher.  I told him that no matter what, I wanted to have a play in which someone killed someone else on stage, because in most plays there isn't enough action.  I also wanted something dark and scary, because that's also not often done in one act plays.  We wrote a play called 'Jessica's Problems' (below).  When they got up to announce the plays, the director had a caveat that "One of the plays has some adult content."  Hmm.. Could that be our drinking, drug use, murder, and nonconsensual teenage sex?  Yeah, that was ours. 

We didn't win, but our play was entertaining, and the actors loved it, and I was really happy with the job they did.  If I'm invited next year, I'll bring a lot of friends, because the audience award was judged primarily on who got the most people to clap for them.

Both awards went to Kolby's play again, who was lucky enough to get paired with John Vornholt.  Their play really deserved the awards. Our play was good, but not as creative as a play about two bowling pins and their arch nemesis the bowling ball.  Most of the other plays were, unfortunately, PLAYS in which the writers strove for deep meaning and symbolism and a poignant remark on the human condition.  Think literary short fiction on a stage.  Call me a philistine, but if I'm not entertained, I consider the play/movie/short story/novel a failure.

Forgive the bad punctuation and improper play format.  It was three am.

 
 
11 May 2008 @ 11:31 am
To all my friends who are mothers  
You amaze me. You have such strength and patience. I hope you can take some time today to relax and be taken care of.

Happy Mother's Day.
 
 
11 May 2008 @ 12:43 am
rundown for today  
Busy. But good.

Didn't do everything I wanted to, but then again I didn't count on the fumes fromt he nail salon to affect me the way they did. I usually don't have a problem with the fumes. In fact I will admit that I sorta like the smell. I am weird I know.

But this pregnancy sorta killed that. Whew, as we pulled into the parking lot of Ross I realized I needed to go home cause my stomach was doing all sorts of funny flip flops. ick. Daughter was a little upset but we went back to wal~mart later and got her a new swimsuit.

I did get my jasmine plant. Oh man that brings back memories of my grandmother's house in CA.
Then I tried to write while hubby watched the last half of Transformers. **see prior post slamming Timberlake on the conversation that ensued from that**

My hubby is outspoken, critical, has no compassion for strangers and opinionated. In the current era of tiptoeing with words to avoid **gasp** offending someone, he is a breath of fresh air. He says what he thinks and doesn't sugar coat it. Politically correct he is not. Thank the powers that be. Often times his statements are off the wall, crude, generalizing and completely wrong but the delivery is wonderful (he could be a stand up comedian, seriously, if he wasn't afraid of speaking in public). Often times we do not agree. But I wouldn't have him any other way.

Anyways, we had a small discussion about current music trends. He is a fan of the big hair bands and operatic metal (King Diamond/Merciful Fate are his choice of music) and anything made post 1992 that doesn't fall into that heavy metal range he considers crap.

Of course I got into music with the onset of grunge and 'alternative'. There have been times when our music discussions have gotten slightly heated. I'll listen to almost anything. No Opera, can't take that. And the newer rap stuff is worse than fingernails on a chalkboard in stereo (IMO). But I'll listen to some country, blues, rock, alternative, you name it, I'll listen to it once (sometimes twice) before I pass judgment. And just because I'll listen to one song by one group doesn't mean I like everything by them. There are two groups that I have honestly not found a song of theirs I don't like; Nickleback and Chevelle. ahhh but I digress

Anywho we discussed a few points of what passes as popular music (would that be pop? rmb?) today. Both of us were able to agree to the fact that many 'new' songs that we have heard, aren't really all that good. He wouldn't admit that they had any good points at all which is where I said; oh idea! I need to write a bit hon. Yeah, I do that when I don't feel like trying to change his opinion on something, or if I feel that the conversation is getting a little too intense. It isn't worth the argument that could have happened.

Silly man. :P

anyways, we watched the beginning of Scary Movie 4, not my fav movie (I prefer Scary Movie 3), and hubby passed out so I turned off the tv. And now I am here, practicing typing with longer nails than I have had in a while. :P

Listening to Staind.

I should probably just post this and go to bed. But I am having too much fun giggling at the funny typos I keep having to fix(I wrote: dix first lol).

ok, night all.
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Current Mood: silly